Alternative Dispute Resolution & The Parable Of The Orange

Many people have heard the parable about the siblings who are fighting over an orange. The parent cuts the orange in half and gives each sibling one half to stop the fighting. One sibling scoops out the pulp and throws it in the trash and uses the peel zest to flavor a dessert. The other sibling uses the pulp to make juice and throws the peel away. This is often how litigation works. The judge tries their best to “split the baby” or will simply award the “orange” to one person and the other person is left with nothing.

This story is used to highlight the benefits of mediation: if the parent would have simply asked the siblings, “why” do you want the orange, they both would have received a better outcome. One sibling would have had the entire orange pulp to use for juice and the other would have had all of the peel to zest for the dessert. In mediation, you not only save (literally) thousands of dollars on litigation costs and hundreds of hours away from your life and the people you love, but there is an opportunity to explain your “why.” Explaining one’s “why” not only creates an atmosphere for creative problem solving, but it can mend relationships.

Next time you find yourself in a dispute with someone, try asking them (genuinely & politely) “why” they feel the way they do or “why” they would like a particular outcome. You might learn something new about them and yourself, while solving a problem before it gets out of control. If that doesn’t work, contact a mediator to assist with the process. Our office offers a free half hour consultation.